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Taking Back Control of my Mind and Body

  • Location: Lubbock,
I am overweight. I have been called chunky my whole life even though I was skinny, I just had some curves while my older siblings were just stick figures. I was always bother by being called fat it always made me felt less than my siblings. When I was young I had some traumatic thing happen to me which caused me to have an unhealthy relationship with food. I was left alone at a young age unable to finish high school and unable to enroll into a GED program because I was a minor and needed a parent to enroll me. I had a period in my life where I was starving and I had to eat food out of a trash can. At 17 years old I had to decide do I pay bills or buy food, I paid my bills. When my life became happier and I was able to eat when before I felt hungry, I could not stop eating. I never wanted to feel that hunger pain again. I HATE that feeling it caused me to have emotional reactions like anger, anxiety and sadness. Hunger is a trigger, a reminder of my hard life, of being abandoned at such a young age. I was able to get my GED at 24 years old and teach myself how to use a computer. I have worked very hard to achieve small things that came easy and free to others. I feel successful in my accomplishments and through my self taught abilities I have become a leader, someone my management can count on. I am now 41 years old, I own my home, I have 3 children and a loving husband, I am ready to loose weight and loose my past trauma. I have prayed and forgiven my self and everyone who was evolved in my pain. I have let go of unhealthy relation ships and refuse to let hunger rule my life. I started fasting and praying through my hunger to reach a forgiveness for what I believed was a betrayal of my own body. I now view the hunger pains as a cleansing, as a reminder to pray to forgive. I started my forgiveness journey a couple of years ago, but I have just started my weight loss journey 3 weeks ago. At 5' 1" 235lbs and I am down to 224lbs. I am eating, I am practicing intermittent fasting and portion control which I believe is about taking control back over my own mind and body. Although this plan has helped me I have to say that getting my mind and spirt back on track will be the keys to my success.